Do what I like, eat what I like, wear what I like…in order to like myself. You might say it’s a selfish love. Well…it is and it isn’t ! Because when I feel good, I pass the happiness on and share it with others.
When I come to work in the morning my colleagues ask me how come do I look so happy. When I come back home my boyfriend asks me the same thing. And I always reply that I don’t know, that I simply am. Happy.
There’s been so many motivational books and guides written already, all those “How to…” and “10 ways to…” that claim they will make your life better. Happier. There are so many couches who can teach you how to live a happy, balanced life. Why do we need the help of those to feel happy? When it’s so simple! Maybe it’s because the society nowadays is too fast, too stressed out and too busy with other things that people somehow forget about the basics.
When I say it’s simple, it really is. Don’t get mistaken, I’m not another motivational speaker, I just want to share my experience with you.
Let’s start with food. Why? Because it’s the most fundamental thing, it’s the fuel that gets you going! Learn to eat well. That means learn to eat food that gives you energy and fills your stomach for as long as possible. Listen to your body. Sometimes the things we take for granted because “the scientist say so” or because “everybody does it that way” don’t have to be quite right for us. Eat when you’re hungry, drink when you’re thirsty. Don’t bother your mind with the fact that the doctors say that we should drink at least 3 litres of liquids per day. Your body will tell you. Eat rather light meals that give you energy, not the heavy ones after which you have to lay down and all of a sudden half of the day is gone.
Love your food. I have a great relationship with the things I buy. What can be bought packaging-free, I buy in the local zero-waste store. Putting those grains and scooping those dried fruits in my own little bags just makes my relationship with the goods I buy better. I love to take my time on the weekends to do my little tour: go to the butchers; get some nice piece of chicken or beef, go to the market or the greengrocer to buy veggies, fruits and cilantro (love that thing!), go to the cheese shop to buy (and taste!) some delicious cheeses. Try do that once instead of going to a supermarket! You might say it’s not convenient and you don’t have time for this but try. Food is something you should always have the time for. Guarantee you will feel differently about the things you consume.
Clothes might not be your fuel, but it is a big part of you, since it’s something you put on every single day. I know that high waist jeans and crop tops are so in and luckily I have the body shape which can afford them, but I still prefer loose tops and blouses and regular pants. I feel so tucked in and have to keep an eye on my belly all the time (I hope I don’t look like pregnant…!), not even speaking about after having lunch(!). When you don’t feel comfortable in your clothes, people can feel it. They feel that you don’t feel good. Is red in? I don’t like red. I prefer my pastels, grey and white.
And I bet with you I shine more in grey than in bright red.
I don’t want to tell you to wear ANYTHING, because I still like when people dress fashionable and nice, and I try to do so, too. But you don’t need to wear this and that because you saw it on instagram or in Vogue. Be in but be yourself and dress things that make you both LOOK and FEEL nice.
You know what I’m about to say now. You’ve guessed it – do what you like doing.It’s so obvious, yet so many of us spend their time by doing things they don’t enjoy. Or they don’t do the things they enjoy because of some social expectations or norms. I do exercise basically every day. “Isn’t that too much?!” Maybe yes, maybe no, but it makes me feel so good! It’s my motivation during the day in the office. There’s nothing better than going out and train under the setting sun, moving your body and releasing the endorphins. I like meeting new people. I like chatting with interesting people, I like listening to people. Am I too outgoing in some peoples’ eyes? Whatever. I like cooking every single day because I enjoy it and I don’t care that it takes quite a lot of my time. I like cleaning the kitchen, I like playing Candy crush while eating, I like to pet other peoples’ cats, I like listening to cheeky female rappers like Cardi B or Nicki Minaj, I like browsing clothes sites without actually buying anything, I like to take the tram instead of metro although it’s 10 minutes longer, I like burning candles and writing on Friday evenings. And travelling, of course. And Africa.
Find out what you like doing and then stick to it. Don’t let yourself get trapped in the stereotype though, challenge yourself and change your tiny habits time to time. New and fresh is also the key to the inner happiness.
People sometimes say something like “I’ll be happy when I’ll have/I’ll be/…. No. You will be happy only when you find out what makes you happy. Because it’s the little things that make you feel good. Pass the happiness on, it’s the only thing that can be multiplied by sharing.